It can't possibly be!

I was going to start the day's blog off with a story of sadness and woe. But at approximately frenchclass o' clock in the morning i realized, in a streak of brilliance, that today is the last day of april*! So no bad news for you!! It was choir-related, so i'll just wait until state contest is over tomorrow to share.

As much as i am sad BEDA is ending, i am happy that Alyssa and i both made it [per se] and can now celebrate with our nerdfighter celebration we have been planning! More on this when it happens {it WILL happen}.

SO: what's a blogger to do to celebrate the end of BEDA? I'll tell you what she does! SHE REVIEWS!! In a fun, nerd-friendly way, of course. Without further ado, A look at BEDA with NUMBERS!!

Number of times i wrote a longer-than-two-words-linked-with-hyphens word: 27

Number of times i wrote IN CAPS**: 147

Times my footnotes were longer than the actual blog: 1

Number of sentences i ended with ... : 18

Number of parentheses, brackets, and those fancier-than-thou brackets: 31

Pictures i used: 16

times i mention interrobangs: 2!?!?

Mentionings of shakespeare***: 9

Date i gave up on tags for my posts: Saturday, April 11.

A-hahaha!! Isn't it fun to reminisce?

Also, i feel like i should've undergone an immense change. Like, i went to bed one day blogging about lopsided wooden elephants and woke up the next day...not... And yet?

Baby steps, yes? Baby steps.

IN OTHER NEWS: Tessa has brutally informed me that as a whole, the Great and Powerful Internets has decided to move away from putting actions into asterisks and using ::verb::. She has encouraged me to switch. I'm not suuure.... It might make my footnotes less confuzzing? Hmm.

AND A FRENCH STORY: Today, during verb conjugations {what we do when Monsieur is checking leurs devoirs}, i got bored. And as anyone knows, boredom + maddi + little supervision doesn't really add up to safety, now does it? So, when the last person had written up the conditionnel for se laver, i snuck up to the front board, and with the egging of Tim, wrote in huge letters, "OUCH!"****. Then, i went back to my seat to wait.

You see, whenever anyone writes something on the board that ISN'T strictly an assignment, Msr May must comment on it. And whenever someone says something that he thinks would sound funny in french, he goes, "En Francais? It is..." and goes on to tell us the nature of the word, etc*****. So throughout all the reading-aloud of the conjugations, Tim and i sat giggling, just waiting for him to get to the front board.

Finally, he got there. And passed it over. He read all the other words on the board and then said, "Ouch? Who wrote that?" Silence. "Weeeeell, En Francais, we say..." and went on to tell us the history of "Aie!" and what his Polish wife says when she burns herself. All in all a pretty successful day. We tried again with "Yippee!" and "Hoorah!", but he did not notice them...

The moral of BEDA: Don't tan so much you turn orange. Ever.******

*Read: I excitedly told Tim that it was thursday the 29th. And he corrected me.
** I should mention for this that i'm going by groups. To save my sanity.

***This is actual mentionings of The Man. Not just speaking shakespeareanly, as i am quite prone to doing.

****The reason for this word in particular is that Tim had just been speaking about interjections and said that an exclamation point was an interjection. It isn't.

*****A few days ago, he enlightened us on the word "sabotage", giving a detailed history of wooden shoes along with it.

******Yes, i understand this does not really have to do with BEDA, as i've never mentioned orange people before. But think about it. Isn't it a good moral anyhow? :)

HAPPY BLOGGING Y'ALL!

WHENEVER I WANT TO PUT SOMETHING IN CAPS, I HAVE TO PRESS SHIFT

This is the truth. I almost never use that nasssty caps lock button because a) i always forget i have it on and try to shift, therby negating the effect and making it lowercase and b) IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I'M SHOUTING IF I TYPE WITH ONLY ONE FINGER.*

Anyway, i wanted to write about some funny happenings during the day today. I had, like, three stories that were humourous, but i can only think of one right now. Without further ado, i present to thee,

A Frenchman's Tale.

So lately, in Fabulous French class, we've been learning about Daily Activities>showering**, brushing teeth, raping puppies, you know, things of that nature. As such, we had a worksheet last night with illustrations we were supposed to caption. Now, one of the illustrations had a picture of a boy, washing himself, with a towel wrapped around his waist, and we were all discussing if he was "Lave" or "prendre a douche"***. Some argued that if he were really taking a shower, he would not have the towel on, and others retaliated that WHY would he wash himself with nothing but a towel on??? Some how, the discussion veered toward the irreverent when someone asked why he had the towel on anyway? Monsieur May, ever the epitome of class, said that "he doesn't want his family jewels on display".**** THEN, he said that we might be embarassed if the boy were in true shower-taking fashion. Tim boldly said that he would not be embarrassed. With that, Monsieur gives Tim this slooooow look up at his face, down to his *ahem* pants-type area and back up to his face, and says, "Really?".

Tim just looked at me and told me how violated he felt.

Oh, Monsieur May, i treasure you. Never leave us! :)



*And THAT, ladies and gents is your not-so-fun fact o' the day! Wee!
** You have no idea how many nasty jokes we've made out of "Prendre a douche" and the beloved "What activities are in the bedroom" Worksheets.
***For the non-francophones: Washing or taking a shower.
****Keep in mind, this man is pleasantly plump. And balding. But we love

REALLY?? Really, computer, THAT'S how you wanna do it??!?! I'll show you, you little non-music-loving

So at this point, i have exactly 7,488 songs on my ipod*. And I {THANKFULLY} have a 60g ipod, so i've got quite a bit of space left. And honestly, i've always thought of my ipod [DB is her name, in case you were wondering] as some bottomless pit of storage, and i can just dumpdumpdump any music i might ever want to listen to on her**. So IMAGINE my surprise when i tried uploading a Mountain Goats album, followed by Lily Allen's new album, followed by Company, only to have itunes interrupt the retrieving of Track 3, "The Little Things You Do Together" with an error message- and i quote- "Dammmmmit, maddi! You are filling up this entire computer with far too many musics and suches. I simply cannot sustain life with all this, you pants-wearing woman! I am but a simple computer and therefore below even ancient DB!"***.

Yeah, that's right. My computer just rejected another album, because ALTHOUGH my ipod can still fit atleast 10 more podcasts and 60 albums, my computer has just given up. Niiiice. Realll nice.

This angers me actually, quite a lot. But little does computer know, i am QUITE the force to be reckoned with. I RECRUIT FATHER! Bwahahahaha!!


More later.

that's right. DB is so old-school, she is called "Classic". Oh yeahhh.

*Why yes, most of these ARE musicals. How did you know?

**There ARE some songs on my ipod i've never listened to before.

***Well, maybe i paraphrased

I am feeling blehh and sad

Also, i had a long day. With homework.
Be appreciative i posted so much yesterday, kay? Mmmkay.

i am so very, very sore

So yesterday, i stilted the majority of the day, while holding debutante stilters up the remaining time. Ergo, when i woke up today, i was feeling exceedingly OWish.

You know what DOESN'T improve a situation like this? Taking a >three hour master class in ballet and modern dance. I know, right? You would never expect something like THAT to make you feel sore-er, would you? COMPLETELY UNEXPECTED!*

Really, the class was great. The ballet teacher was really wise and really british, continually saying things like "Jolly good!".

And i love modern dance, although i've taken maybe two actual classes of it in my life, and don't naturally move that way. I remember at this thing last year, we had Horton technique modern, which i liked even better, and was even worse at. Go figure.

I spent the rest of the day writing out notes for my research project**.

OH! And as promised: STILT PICTURES!

I don't really feel like putting my face on here, sorry.

so butt-shots are the best i can do...

*Sorry, this is getting kind of sarcastic and cynical. My bad.
**Remember? Isadora Duncan. I test your memory, yes?

PICTURES TO FOLLOW

So today, i spent the entire bloody-sun afternoon out stilting. It was quite nice actually. I was wearing my 3-and-a-half-foot stilts, thereby ALMOST doubling my height. Weee!

Tonight, i'm actually going to see [tos]!
Speaking of: Nick- my phone has been spazzy all day, but i just sent you a text about that subject. I'm busy the weekend of the playhouse, but my parents just randomly told me we were getting tickets tonight! Have fun going with Pam?

:)

I just tested my aerodynamics

On the way home from dance. I stuck my arm out the window and was playing around with my fingers and going up or down. *prides self on nerdiness*

Also, i fell down WAY too many times during dance class. I've got a few *choreographed* falls in my dance, but i just kept forgetting where my feet belonged at other times in the class.

ANYWAY, i'm going to my school's talent* show tonight to quote-unquote "Work lights"**, then to go get ice cream, so i figure i'll be proactive and NOT like last week...Oooh boy.

Tomorrow, i'll be stilting.

HAVE A FUN WEEKEND, KIDS!


*i use this word in the loosest sense... ;)
**This too, i use in the loosest sens, as i will be "working" with Mel. So really? Actual work is most likely not going to get done..

A GLORIOUS DAY!

And not just because the week is almost over, and i am madly excited for the weekend. No, today we discuss a Fantastic subject:

the man himself. quite pleased at this event.

Shakespeare's birth/death day*! I celebrated by wearing one of my three shakepearean shirts. You know, the one that has Shakespeare's picture on a bucket o' KFC with the caption "A secret recipe of Verbs and Vices". It narrowly lost to the Uncle-Sam-esque picture of Shakespeare with the the caption "Are YOU a friend of Bill S.?". Oh, punnery, how i love thee. I also counted how many Shakespeare plays/movies i've seen**, listening to a couple RSC radio shows, and getting "The Complete Works of Shakespeare: Abridged"*** movie from the library to watch. I also told of my excitement to my aforementioned English teacher, Harb. He was not joyous, as one might expect from the birthday announcement of such a beloved poet/playwright****, but rather questioning on the actuality of this date. To be completely honest, this date as his birthdate is not set in stone*****, but its a fair bet, comparing to his baptismal records {Which they DID set in stone}. He proceeded to question if i would role pursue i would pursue when it came time to read aloud Romeo and Juliet- actual or cross-dressing? This is the point where i gave him a wide-eyed, i-cannot-believe-you-just-asked-me-that-but-if-you-had-given-me-due-time-to-think-about-it-i-would-have-a-whole-lot-to-say-about-it-believe-you-me***** and Ashley jumped in with a helpful "Maddi loves male parts!". THIS, believe it or not, is actually an inside joke as well as a real quote that i said last year******* in reference to my playing Sir Kay instead of Guinevere for "The Sword in the Stone!". He walked outside the room to escape the male-awkwardness of it all {have i mentioned that in my Honors english class of 16, there's only one guy? yeah.}

Later, i went to choir and kind of died. Judy [choir teacher] was being super spectacular and threatening to beat people up if they did not behave, which was much needed, considering we're going to states in a week, and I AM SO SICK OF THE PEOPLE IN MY TREBLE CHOIR WHO DON'T CARE! But then she pulled out the sight-reading music. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE sight-reading music. Its high-endorphine and thrilling and Weee! But Treble choir's sight-reading leaves a lot to be desired*******. Judy was getting especially antsy with us Altos, for not sounding good, and not singing strong enough, and singing wrong pitches and "We're too old for that!". She pulled her piano right in front of our section just to get us to sing the right notes {it was a chromatic scale downward. not. that. hard.}. But we just kept epic-failing our way through the piece. She had to stop the class and just work with us, scream at us, and move two girls before we could even barely get there. The worst part?
She was totally justified. Really! As we were leaving class, Rachel kept telling me how rude she was acting, and she must be stressed, and yadayadayada, but despite the severe butt-whooping i had just received, i found myself DEFENDING HER! Because she was right to criticize us and call us out on all those insecurities! WE NEEDED THAT.

*deep breath* Its just difficult, because i THINK i know what i'm doing all the time and what notes to sing, and i WANT to lead our section [and i think today, i may have been getting there] but i just am not THAT SURE. So it leaves me feeling "Ehhh". Whenever Judy says that there is something wrong with the alto's notes, i always have that self-conscious "eeEEee! That had better not be me! If that's me...."

So the moral of the story? WRITE DOWN ALL DATES, regardless if you think they matter. :)



*Alyssa doesn't like that he was born and died on the same day. Like "What a birthday present!" I, on the other hand, prefer to think of it as more of a "Oh, how old were you when you died?" "Haha, funny you should ask, but EXACTLY 52 years old!!" kinda thing.
**To date, and including repeats, 10.
***I've read the script. Yet another work of genius from the Reduced Shakespeare Company.
****Did you know this word did not exist when Shakespeare lived? Makes me wonder what he might've called himself.
*****They didn't do the best recording of dates back in the day. And in all fairness, they didn't know shakespeare would turn into...well, SHAKESPEARE...
******WOW. that was a really long word spaced with hyphens....But really, i have A LOT to say about this subject.
*******I had gone through my history of roles in my life and was shocked to discover that about 75% of my roles had been males, or male-but-we-don't-have-enough-guys-so-now-it's-a-girl. And i was pretty okay with it. REALLY. Guys get better parts! [Especially in medieval plays...]
*******To clear this up: I'm in two choirs. Concert Choir is mixed SATB, and i sing soprano for that. But i wanted to learn how to really read vocal music, so i joined Treble Choir {SSA} as an alto.

i am

feeling blehh as well as blahh. Also i have a serious pantsload of homework to do. But i am listening to tchaikovsky=okay.

Isadora Duncan

I was listening to one of many French cds i have today, whilst making cookies*. This happened to be a Putumayo-made lotsandlotsofrealguaranteedfrenchartistssosuckit kinda cds. Among relative unknowns like Sandrine Kiberlain and Pascal Lejeune and JP Nataf, there was the relative {unknown only in America***}, Carla Bruni. And let me tell you, she has an amazing voice! Nicholas Sarkozy ought to count his blessings! *WOOOOSH!****

Anyway, title of this blog. In english these days, we've just started our research project. My goal was to do someone i actually care about, but who's so obscure that no one has heard of them. After rejecting Edith Piaf {not enough resources}, Martha Graham {too many, plus kinda boring}, and Katharine Dunham, i settled on Isadora Duncan. And am i glad i did! There are enough books in the library about her, but NO ONE in my english class of heard of her. And she's such a great woman! She was totally eccentric and borderline-insane***** and SO DRIVEN. Absolutely nothing held her back. She started out her life fatherless, poor, and switching houses fifteen times a year. At six, she told off her school teacher for encouraging her classmates to believe in Santa Claus. At twelve, she taught dancing lessons. And it all goes up from there. She is known as the Mother of Modern Dance. As much as we now look up to titles like that nowadays, at the turn of the century, she was considered revolutionary [in a non-complimentary way] and had to go to Europe to find Real Appreciation for her art (i.e. NOT old stuffed society ladies in New York). And there? Critics put up major fusses over her personal life, near-naked costumes and lack of ballet-osity. And what did she do to respond? Isadora Duncan, hero to all, opened up a serious can of W.A. She made connections with the most powerful people in the European art scene, verbally pique-arabesque-kicked the critics, and sold out recitals all over the world. She opened many schools, each one closed for money-related complaints, because she did not want to charge her pupils for a Duncan-ized education. She had 3 illegitamate children {all died, tragically} and did not believe in marriage. She wanted an equal partnership with equal respect to HER career. This woman did everything. Even her death was dramatic- her neck cracked when an especially long scarf got caught in the spokes of a fancy car******.

And with THAT note... :)


*They turned into wannabe-souffles**. let that be a lesson.
**Souffle means "blow" in French. YOU LEARN SOMETHING EVERYDAY.
***Because we are ignorant and full of ourselves. Duhh.
****You hear that? That was the sound of that [grantedly, not very funny] joke going over the head of million Americans.
*****Alyssa: Haha, you and her are like two peas in a pod maddi! Verrrry funny lyss...
****** If/when i die, i would like to die in a scarf-related fashion. Keep this in mind, all you would-be murderers.

Twilight: A Saga [You know, of fans]

First things first: Just found omnictionary.com. spend QUITE SOME TIME* reading all the B2.0 quotes. Deee-lish. Also, I LOVE how John's "Education Face"** is like he's perpetually surprised. It's great.

Anyways, the title.

I'm not part of the "original" fandom for twilight. I actually picked up the cd at the library before any of my friends had heard of it and started listening. But the boringness of the first chapters mixed with my actual dislike for audio recordings that AREN'T a tape led me to put it down.
Months later: Allison and Alyssa and Steph are RAVING about this new series, have i heard of it? I one-hundred-percent trust the judgement of these girls and read it. Then i realize. It's that book i rejected! I generally don't pick up reject books, but with THIS MANY friends loving it...How could i not? I read the three first books as fast as i could get them from the library. I wish i could rewind to this time to see how i Honestly felt about them. I remember having Le Crush on The Edward and looking over Alyssa's shoulder in the morning to see Twi-flair. But did i genuinely like the books? I can't remember.
If the fandom development were grouped into stages, i can imagine Fanfiction being the third or fourth stage. Anyway, the fanfic strengthened the shaky ground my Love of Twi was built on. After that: Twilight podcasts. Talking with friends about BD theories. Looking at behind-the-scenes for the movie and reading Steph Meyer's posts. Being oooh soo mad that someone leaked MS.

I was in San Diego when BD came out, no one was ready to give up "their babies" to lend me when i got back and i sure as heck WAS NOT going out to buy my- god forbid- Own Copy*** so i was forced to wait for Ashley to get two copies of the book accidentally to read the controversial story. I liked it. I hated it. I wanted someone [important!] to die!
Then: Phases started putting out less podcasts and i had better things to do than read mindless fanfic. Twilight was in a decline.
Suddenly, an event that would change Twilight in my eyes. Forever.



The movie.

I sucked up my opinion for quite a while after seeing it, in deferance for those who actually liked it. But really? It was so laughably bad. K-stew's performance is only the tip of the long, freezing cold, vampiric iceberg.
I just couldn't believe that a franchise i had put my faith in for so long had DIED so suddenly. Just like that, i was done with Twilight.
I had a couple relapses- re-reading the books****, crying at said books, still talking about rpattz's hotness*****- but all in all, Twilight was over pour moi.

Now? I think i'm part of the jaded, bitter Twi-hards. The ones who declare they "read twilight before people loved it" and find themselves defending steph meyer to those who hated the film. We go into Borders and actually moan in pain at seeing the shelves upon shelves stocked with Twilight, and have to leave at the sight of the table filled with action figures or knock-off Twilights******.Us kids who now kindofsortamaybe dislike the newcomers to the Twilight fandom, who scoff at the ones who got "hooked on the first book" or "HAD to read them after the movie! *Squee*" with an added "i TOLD myself i wouldn't read this series".
Yeah well, it happens to the best of us. You'll see soon enough. :)


*oh god, i actually just spelled that "Thyme". As in the seasoning? "Hoho, Sage, that's quite some thyme you've got there!" "Thanks, Nutmeg, isn't it something?"
**You know, when he starts out the vlog, or on sundays, or is just saying something Really Important that doesn't require an animated face?
***Been through all that with Harry Potter, thankyouverymuch
****This time, i really didn't like them. I skipped whole chapters that bored me and laughed out loud at a couple of unintentionally funny lines.
*****Hey, just because his MOVIE sucked...
******Last time i went to the library, i saw a series called "Vampirates". Now THERE's someone taking advantage of crazy fads and fandoms. *soul dies*

lazypants

I recorded a 30s-style, TKAM-based radio show avec ma tashley and went over my grandma's house for her birthday today. It was really nice, as i stuffed myself waaay too much and looked at really old photographs*.

I can't remember what it was, but something throughout the day reminded me of the movie Little Miss Sunshine**. I watched this movie first*** at Mel's house with Katie and Cari. And the eventful viewing {which directly followed the viewing of Across the Universe and Superstar!} further proved that i CANNOT be told trivia during a movie. It just distracts me for absolutely no good reason.

Case in point: Katie told me during the first few minutes that Abigail Breslin, playing Olive, wore a fat suit for the movie. I, understandably, as i was looking at the beauty that IS Dwayne/Paul Dano misunderstood. I mistook her for saying that OLIVE the CHARACTER was wearing a fat suit. As such, i was waiting the ENTIRE MOVIE for her to take off her fat suit to be the really skinny kid she is. Finally, within the last ten minutes, i looked over to Katie and, exasperated, asked, "Katie, WHEN does she get skinny??". Katie looked at me like i was insane**** AND had kissed a zombie, all while sprouting a few horns. Then, she calmly explained that the ACTOR wore a fat suit. *Ohhhhhh*. We finished up the movie, still laughing at that.

So really, save the comments. Isn't that what credits are for?

*I love doing this

**I love this movie

***And, by first i mean ONLY

****Alyssa: Haha, maddi IS insane.

Hmmmm

I just looked on this site, thinking "Well, shoot i hope i don't have some admonishing coments for totally captaining the fail boat for posting well."

IMAGINE MY SURPRISE: my two posts from yesterday/this morning were filed under "Friday, April 17"! Tis quite, QUITE odd. Looking at the time stamp, it also said i posted it at ten. Will the mysteries shrouding my fail never cease?
It's odd, but i actually considered the possibility that i MIGHT fool blogger and be able to pretend i posted it earlier. I was quite ecstatic at the prospect of NOT FAILING. And now? I feel kind of gipped* that i don't get the neglect. Like, that bit made my stories brutal and honest and street and harsh. Whatever. It's weird.

NEW NEWS: Wee for BEDA buddies! One of them is now following me! *Waves* HI LUCY! I'm friends on Ning avec the others.
Lucy: Sorry if this is a creeper-ish vibe, but i was reading your pre-BEDA posts. I really like the whole "one photograph a day/year" project! I totally doubt my ability to complete it successfully, though. Also: i admire your Canadienne-ness and breaking-into-french-osity. And have i mentioned? YOUR PHOTOS ARE SO BEAUTIFUL. I feel extreme jealousy over your camera. :)



*Where does this word come from? *looks up**
**Augh, as i feared, comes from "Gypsy". Now i feel like i can't use it. :(

That Geometry thing i mentioned before {if you're just joining us now, YOU'RE LOST}

It took me about three tries and countless hours* to actually go upstairs and get the paper i wrote my blog draft on, because i'd go up and say to myself** "oh, don't you still have to text Taissa? Yes, yes you do." And, "Oh, wouldn't you like a slightly raw cookie?*** Of course!". So, this geometry-written, flavored-by-Warreeeen-the-psycho blog better be good.

So, today i made a new game in geometry. I was zoning out, because, honestly, i get lost at about "Take out your graph paper," surfacing only for an occasional "Now get colored pencils."****So anyway, new game-kinda like a makeshift scrabble... I use graph paper***** to write out my name and then just keep going. Best part: NO REAL RULES! Names, products, french cursewords...IT'S ALL GOOD!


Yupp. Aren't you glad you got that? :) And while you may look at the footnotes and notice how they SEEM longer than the blog itself, keep in mind.....no i really can't justify that. Sorry.



*a slight exaggeration? you decide
**mumbling like that jolly old creeper i am!
***On this: BECAUSE i was in such a im-so-rushed-i-cant-even-blog rush leaving for the party, i didnt get to cook the dough i was making. i just kinda shoved the whole thing into a pan and left with the oven preheated to 350, but turned off. FAIL.
****And really, Warreeeeeeeeeeen keeps her room toasty and never pays attention to little old, way-back-of-the-room Maddi, so this is an OPPORTUNE time for a wee nap. Today, i had to throw my folder on the floor so i could get out of my seat to pick it up to keep from falling asleep.
*****Really, for a better purpose than those infernal graphs...

NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOO

I cannot believe it. I JUST CANNOT BELIEVE IT.

I missed a day.

AUUUGHH!!

It feels like such the waste because i KNEW full well that i wouldn't be getting home from my party until crazy-late, so i wrote out the full post in geometry*. I was planning on coming home and having plenty o' time before Taissa's party to write up the notecard i planned out when i should've been doing formulae**. HOWEVER, times a-changed and my brother had to drive me out to B-view 40 minutes earlier. Plus it took about MY LIFESPAN to get good, non-freeway-going directions.

It's not like a regret the party because...heheee...it was a good party. But STILL. I just find losing NOW, THIS WAY very disappointing.

Some good news: I'm going to double-post. So once this goes up, i'll write up the original geo-planned one. YES.
Also: PARADE THE CIRCLE! WOOO!!!!***


*Really? You thought i would do something better???
**This is the correct pluralization of formula.
***You might not know what this means. Stick with me, and Boy, will you. :)

I HAVE WINGS.

Okay, not really. But you have to admit, you were secretly thrilled to hear about my great turn of fortune, WEREN'T YOU?

I knew it.

Anyway, i was just saying so, because i was wearing my new sweater today*. Its one of those avant-garde, maybe-its-spring-but-maybe-its-totally-not kinda ordeals.

NOT THIS avant-garde

It makes me feel like i have a big huge blanket attached to a normal shirt. And though that sounds like a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad thing to say about a sweater, I MEAN IT WITH LOVE AND HONESTY. I do love this sweater quite a lot.

I was trying to fly with it in the hallway, and very nearly succeeded. Harbison killed my flying dreams.

In other news, i just got back from Chez de La Erin. I was singing THIS. And i use the term "singing" loosely. When i say i was "singing" i mean i was "omygosh-do-i-sing-up-a-third-there?-like-harmony-oh-okay-i-thought-i-was-singing-nevermind". Because YEAH. *facepalms*

*Will do my darndest to get a picture. I KNOW you want a picture.

ACK!

I have to go to bed. Right. Now.
So here's the thought for the day: I'M SO EXCITED FOR BEDA BUDDIES!

:)

lots of love to y'all

Frightened of Knives [Also published as: Textually Reminiscing]

So, i just got finished unloading the dishwasher and PLEASE TELL ME: Am i the only child in the world who feels so verry frightened taking knives out of the dishwasher and putting them into the drawer*? I hope not! It helps none, of course, that i grab a whole handful of them and just schlepp over to their assigned home. I just keep imagining them dropping and cleanly chopping of a toe or two.** And am i so wrong to feel this way??? I imagine there is a community of people like me out there somewhere. For us, there are little conveyor belts to place the knives on that will safely deposit them in the correct drawer. Augh! But what if the machine breaks down?!?! This discussion is now being stowed in the archives of my mind to discuss at a later date. When i'm not feeling so squeamish.

But, i digress. I'm listening to Mozart right now and not only is it adding some drama to an otherwise normal blog-posting, it also soothes my knife-fearing soul.

Today is planned to be "A Trip Down Memory Lane: Text style". We shall examine past texts that i have not deleted in my inbox. While it MAY be boring for you, the reader, it will be ever so beneficial and humourous to me. So, please DEAL WITH IT.

Now: Oct 24, Hallie sends a text filled with the wonders of baby-eating. She says, "Mmm i like the taste of babies. So does ethan. But he only likes them cooked..." Ah, yes. This is following the fateful Marching Band Game*** where Hallie declared she ate all babies. And then distracted us by pointing at the sky and oh-how-pretty it was.
It was actually pretty...
On the way to a dance performance, Nov 8, Anna and i discuss the probability of my being late. I tell her to cross her fingers for me and she replies, "hmmm...my fingers feel a bit brittle so ill cross my pointe shoes for you!" Neverending ray of sunshine, that Anna.
We move on to Nov 11, where Tessa declares herself "Delexkick". While we all know that this is indeed the truth, it still provides a laugh.
Nov 13: Tessa makes another appearance to tell me about the next day being "CHARLIE THE CATERPILLAR ACCENT DAY!". Lyss, of course, can assure you that it did, indeed happen.
Moving on to school-ly matters: Nov 23, Stephanies says of sentence diagramming "Thou art in a shrine harb built for you while he spends his day trying to figure out why he's an english teacher." How right you are, Steph, how right you are.
Barb says on Nov 27 that its best to have a "positive ATTITUDE about eating children...". I'm seeing a theme here?
Nov 29, i have done something wonderful and lyss tells me she will get me a shrine. niice.
Dec 05 brings more preaching from Tessa about the merits of INTERROBANGS?!??!? Yes.
On Dec 14, Lauren educates me on the speed of camel spiders "10 miles per hour!"
Crazed british home-schooled wizards are the subject of debate Dec 18, in the conversation between lyss and me.****
Dec 21 has Nick quoting [tos] fervently: SHE'S GOT THEM BOOBS!


Ahh, tis a sad thing, but i now must go. Good evening my children. :)



*This is where lyss says something snarky like, "Haha, maddi shouldn't be allowed near knives anyway!"
**Ew. Nasty.
***I'm sorry, you all might more readily know these as FOOTBALL GAMES.
****I feel quite sure it should be a me here, as "between" is a preposition, making "me" the object.

overwhelmed like an overwhelmingly overwhelmed duck

I wanted to really use some stunning vocabulary words to describe my feelings today*, so i went you Your Friend and Mine, thesaurus.reference.com to see what they had to offer in terms of "Synonyms to Overwhelmed".

Here's the results from Mr. Roget: affected, devastated, moved, overpowered, repulsed, upset, vanquished, worsted

And that's all. Just to be sure i wasn't missing anything, i looked at the dictionary's thoughts.

And: "To surge over and submerge; engulf: waves overwhelming the rocky shoreline.
To defeat completely and decisively: Our team overwhelmed the visitors by 40 points.
To affect deeply in mind or emotion: Despair overwhelmed me.
To present with an excessive amount: They overwhelmed us with expensive gifts.
To turn over; upset: The small craft was overwhelmed by the enormous waves. "

Now, i don't know how i feel about this. There are DEFINITE negative connotations to here, but i myself have always thought the feeling of overwhelm-ity to be not neccessarily good, but certainly not awful. The definitions and synonyms are all of defeat and wiped out and losing and "Oh boy, guys, i sure wish we could've done BETTER".

And not looking towards the future either. It's all looking at the PAST and what HAPPENED to cause you to BE OVERWHELMED. And this is odd.

Personally, i am feeling overwhelmed because i look at my calendar and see zero free days until...umm...June. This OVERWHELMS me. HOWEVER, the calendar did not run over to me and knock me out and use all of his backup calendar forces and past months to kill me in battle. It did not overwhelm me in That Way.

So is there a different word i am thinking of? One that doesn't insinuate a large-scale battle of epic proportions resulting in my demise? HALP.

not really

*AFTER, you know, the title....

Oatmeal?

First offs, happy Easter to y'all! The ol' bunny o' wonder came to me* and brought with 'im** money, chocolate, chocolate chips, chocolate truffles, chocolate sauce, and MALT EGGS!!

mmmm. THAT's the good stuff.

I know this comment will spark a certain amount of debate. Lyss, for one, does not like these malt eggs. She thinks they are "gross". However, to rebut her point, i think her beloved peeps are "Ew-inducing". So we're even.



Anyway, the point of the title is that i'm worried of losing my edginess****. Last night, my blog was "infiltrated" by a wonderful lady. I'm not sure if i've mentioned her on here before, but it's MY MOTHER! I really do love this woman as much as i was apalled and shocked that she would read my blog!!?!?! The reason is confusing even to me. Why can i publish all of this without giving a hoot who sees it, UNLESS it's my mama? The internet is a very public place, i know that for a fact. So why is it that when someone i've never met from Oregon or Maine comments i'm enthralled, but when the woman who, in all honesty, probably knows me better than anybody sees it, i am offended?

Maybe the reason is as simple as wanting to have some secrets. Perhaps it's that i know she has the power to punish me for anything i say on here*****. And while i don't exactly walk around writing &^%## or !!!!!#%%*($^&%@, without a REAL authority figure reading what i write, I COULD.

And that is a little odd to me. Do i need to always have that random, bizarre freedom? Should i need to? It's weird.



Anyway, i just don't want to sound boring now that i know i need to quote-unquote "censor" everything i write. I don't want to be boring and blahhh and not saying anything of interest for fear of repercussions and consequences.

not my goal

*Well, i know what you're thinking right now. You're thinking, "That's an awful lot of abbreviations/apostrophes***!" OH YEAH!?!? OH YEAH?!?! Go' e'a't a' pr' o' pnts'. I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE.
**Now i'm just messin' wit' ya'.

***This is a totally tangenty-tangent, but i CANNOT STAND IT when people think they are being all clever and rhetorical in asking "Why is abbreviation such a long word?" You know why? Abbreviation is such a "long word" {i put it in quotes, because, relatively speaking, twelve letters isn't actually a really long word. Hippopotomonstrosesquipedalianism.} because the latin roots say so!

****I know, i know, "What edginess?" Just scroll on back up and wait for me to justify this comment.

*****That's right. Y'all don't.

.....

Brain Block.

I knew it would happen. I KNEW from the beginning that i would wake up one day and just not be entirely INcapable of writing an interesting, witty or worthwhile blog. OF COURSE it would happen! But its BEDA, so it doesn't matter!! WRITE ANYWAY!

I told myself that in this case, i would resort to the less-than-stellar "backup ideas". Ideas that i'd come up with in the past when i didn't feel like actually writing a blog, but still had an idea. Ideas like writing about my Summer O' 2008 Vacation to San Diego or what a good job stilting would be. I WOULD NOT, under any circumstances, just write about said Brain Block.



And yet? Here we are. I have no ideas for something interesting to write, your eyes are glazing over, if you have not already abandoned this page, because YOU SEE that it is a lost cause and WHYCANTMADDIJUSTSEETHATABLOGTODAYISNTHAPPENINGANDTALKABOUTSANDIEGO???? They had pandas in the big ol' San Dee! Pandas are cute! Weee.

Now it's past being boring. Now, it's reminiscent of a mental patient arguing with herself, or a crowd-galvanizer*.


NOW, it has lost practically all reminiscent remains of maddiism. I've used a run-on, a sentence almost entirely one word and in CAPS. Also, i've said "ain't" and "son".

That's it. *throws real-live towel down**


See you tomorrow.


{i'm going to make some cookies now}

*I ain't lookin up that word, son. YOU do it. Wikipedia that siht.
**Right now, you valuable reader(s) are no doubt wondering how i got a hold of a real live towel. To quote an educated source, "Wikipedia that siht."

Herbert, the awkward El-e-phant!

Oh Herb, you make me smile.

This is Herbert in his natural, aesthetically-pleasing environment, the really cheap section of Tar-jay. Here, he is seen with two notveryinteresting giraffes. The giraffes do not have Soul, as Herb does.

You see, Herbert was not appreciated in his scarf-accentuated basket home. Here is a bit of the conversation when i purchased his $2.50 butt.

Saleslady: Ooh....he's....cute?

Me: Don't i know it!! *grins*

Saleslady: I didn't know we had....animals....

Me: YEAH! You also have giraffes!

Saleslady: Ohh...i like...giraffes....

Me: *grins*

Here's another view:

Shown here at the high-society tea party. Note especially, the uneven eyes. That, and the swaggering genius.

I feel like Herbert would be better explained by a song. A drunken, rain-inspired, very haphazard song-

Herbert, the awkward el-e-phant.

Aww, shoot. I've forgotten it.

*STARDUST*

I'm watching Stardust right now. Really, as i type, i am watching Neil Gaiman's sheer genius. I just wanted to make sure i posted before midnight.
So leave me to it, ye lousy louts.

And there you are, right in the middle of what you love, with the craziest of company

Disappointment of the day: my shower. usually relaxing, today's shower was limp and lame. very anemic. most likely suffers from hemophilia? Discuss.* also the fact that i need to really crap this blog out, as my mom is timing me and to bed must i. hence the lack of punctuation, despite the considerable damage to mine soul.

Excitement of the day: Plans for break! To get ice cream tomorrow with mellular po and ajlex and prob. lyss. super shopping spree, tea party on friday. stilting and aladdin/curry on saturday. plus easter!

Love of the day**: RSC! and [TOS]! and alexig! and taissa! and mel!!!

Sadness of the day: *****Someone***** accused me of starving myself, just now. REALLY??? REALL??? I was about to fire back a witty/snarky response like "Yeah, it just sucks because when i don't eat, i actually get FATTER instead of thinner! Crazy, isn't it?", but that probably wouldn't further my cause, eh?

:)


*bringing up blood diseases when talking about water? ewewew. BIO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?!?!?!
**To be discussed in great depth at a later date.

One Grammar Nazi, coming right up

*Trundles up with large cart, chock full of commas and semicolons**
Yes, that's me, your friendly, neighborhood grammar nazi. I'm there when you write your research paper or when you type up your facebook status. I'm even there when you text your friends! Isn't that heartwarming? Don't you feel SAFE??

Don't you dare use a comma when you should really start a new sentence. Don't even THINK about only using half of a complex sentence, thereby creating a fragment. Creative capiTalizatioN? That's fine by me. Odd, combined-with-hyphens-and-nothing-else words? Go for it! I'll even go so far as to be forgiving with paragraph changes. But FOR GOD'S SAKE, DON'T YOU DARE use incorrect subject-verb agreement or end your sentences with a preposition. Should you do so, put up your grammatically incorrect rapiers and prepare for a conjunction-ridden duel.

Let me tell you a story. My history teacher is a big fan of powerpoints*** and as such, had prepared a 20s-era-themed one. We students, of course, diligently took down notes and paid attention. That is, we paid due attention UNTIL Fabian erred. The moment i saw "How did electricity effect cities?", my grammar nazi side took full control. My mind reeled and before i knew it, my hand was up in the air.

"Maddi?"
"I don't mean to be nitpicky, but, with all respect, Mr. Fabian....youusedthewrongformofaffect."****
"?"
"It shouldn't be Effect. Because it's a verb, it has to be Affect."
"..."
"Please, it's really going to bother me. Can you just change it?"

If this were any NORMAL teacher, or if we HAD been discussing grammar, the mistake would have been quickly fixed. If this had been a super-focused-no-distractions teacher, i would have been sternly admonished. Fabian is neither
He went up to the board and with a SmartBoard pen, circled the "E". Then underlined it. Then drew little lightbulb-esque lines coming out of it, as if that "E" were a Broadway billboard announcing a new musical specifically about small language blunders and student mortification. Still in the process of circling and highlighting that dreaded fifth letter of the alphabet, Fabian proceeded to ask me what, indeed, WERE the *ahem* Effects of electricity?
Me? I did what any sane, self-respecting, borderline-OCD, student would do. I held up my binder in front of my face and replied from behind it, "Factories could be built away from a water source". Then i waited for the slide to change.

The point of this story is not whether or not i got the answer correct. The point is this: if you are so desperate for an alliteration between "electricity" and "affect", you should use thesaurus.com to find a suitable synonym*****. You should NOT, under any circumstances, settle for the homonym of "affect".

The other point is that i like grammar. A lot.
Spelling's not so bad either....


*Hmmm. Did i really just start a blog entry with an action in asteriks?**
**What is the proper name for this? I propose we make one up.
***By this, i mean he is a both an enthusiastic fan of powerpoints, and a fan who is large.
****The commas are allowed in such an exorbitant amount here to exemplify the awkwardness of me correcting my history teacher on a rather small error.
*****That was an alliteration. And i didn't even try.

A brief history

In light of recent events*, i have decided to write a slightly longer blog entry. Whether or not this actually turns out longer doesn't matter. What DOES matter is that i'm deciding. Okay.
On most nights, i can't fall asleep right away. I try my ipod, putting the classical music station on softly, counting sheep**, and countless others. I'm not really an insomniac, it just takes me a while to unwind. Anyway, one of the most recent techniques i've had is to think back to a time in my memory and then just go back from there. I've made it to a Pre-school class so far. That's the farthest back i can actually REMEMBER. Oh, and that's another thing. Remembering what people tell me doesn't count, nor does remembering pictures.

PRE-SCHOOL- I carpooled with Erica. I remember looking at my socks one day and saying that they looked like Molly's socks, referring, of course, to Molly McIntyre, the American Girl Doll. They actually really didn't. I also remember my mom's teaching job at a school and getting her smelly markers at the end of the year.
PRE-K- i went to a Catholic Pre-school and pre-k***. At the pre-k, i remember be called back to a little room off of the main classroom. {the reason, i think was to evaluate whether or not we were ready for kindergarten} The teacher showed me a picture of a jesus-fish. I have no idea what that symbolizes. But i went to kindergarten the next year, so it all worked out.
THE SUMMER before kindergarten- I spent almost the whole summer watching my brother play t-ball with my new best friend, Vicky. We wrote stories in blank bound notebooks. I would write the stories, and Vicky would illustrate. I was notorious for starting grandly and then not filling in the rest of the book. We had five or six books, but only two complete stories. I also remember the day before we actually went to kindergarten, going to the school with our parents. Mrs. Y told our parents that in this year we would learn the alphabet and letters in our name. Vicky and i laughed very loudly, because WE had already written novels.
KINDERGARTEN- I was best friends with Amy and every day, when the rest of the kids would leave for the buses, we would sneak back to the sink where they kept the snacks and take extra cookies. I'm not even kidding. ALWAYS. We never got caught.
SECOND GRADE- Stephanie was my best friend. We hung out at recess and both had to stay after school until our parents picked us up. She was always angry that Alex called her "Stepho the magical elf". We were best friends with Nathaniel and the janitor, Piper****. The favorite book was "The Lunchbox". Taylor was also my friend because we read James and the Giant Peach in the advanced reading group and both loved puns. I also remember a week where i pretended i was mad at her. I don't know why.
THIRD GRADE- I lost the end-of-the-year talent show. That's all i REALLY vividly remember about this year.
FOURTH GRADE- I remember going over my best friend Mikaela's house. I didn't know the correct rules to Scattergories, because Amy and i had been playing by the wrong rules our whole lives. We walked her little brother Elijah around the apartments and choreographed dances. Then, we sat on her bed and sang songs from Cats. This is also the year that, at afterschool Katie, Stephanie, Nikki and i concocted a large-scale, seriously elaborate story. It centered around three siblings constantly getting kidnapped. We also had another game about three triplets and their mom. My favorite musical this year was Cats.
FIFTH GRADE- One of the best memories from this year was when Mrs. Morris (resource room teacher) told us to do something long and complicated and i responded "that's wasting time that we don't have". She told me that was "Scary, Maddi". For some twisted reason, i was really proud of that. At the end of the year, i got the award for "Renaissance Woman". Which made me very happy. It IS a good award. Nikki, Steph and i would always come over my house after school, because aftercare at the school had been taken over by weirdos. I remember one day thinking i saw something in the trees. We decided we needed to have an escape plan and fire drill. We practiced using bamboo poles to escape into my basement unseen. This is also the year that my team ALMOST won Academic Challenge.

Well, there on is pretty boring, and far too lucid to be interesting at all. Thanks for reading Maddi's Early Years. Come back next time when we discuss something of interest to ALL! ;o


*My oboe lesson was canceled
**no joke.
***about that: i also remember telling people that they made me wear a uniform there. They really didn't, but i was quite a cunning child and knew that among the most popular public-school-kid things to have were 1)braces 2)recess drama and 3)a past at a different school. Uniforms fit under 2 and 3. Plus, i honestly did think they were awesome. Thus began a lifelong love of plaid.
****Thus began a lifelong love of janitors

NOYO

Am actually feeling quite tired right now. My head was kind of burbling and simmering with ideas of blogs when i got home from NOYO today, but...i'm tired maaaan.


I had my last orchestra concert [of the year] today. I have yet to decide if i will stay with NOYO next year or not. I made a lot of friends with this orchestra, but THE CONDUCTOR HATES ME. * Really, this isn't just an excuse for not being good. He honestly does look down upon me and my wee oboe-playing.** He gave me Oboe II parts this entire year. An act which, in itself, is not inherently evil. However, it IS cold-spirited when he gives the Oboe I parts to alumnus, or FLUTES, for God's sake, FLUTES***!


I digress. The concert went rawther well. We played Beethoven, Schubert, Elgar and Peck.


It was all well and good, but i have sworn my heart to Dvorak. mmmmm

a hot hunk of man meat

*Its mutual...

**erm..

***This would make a mighty good battle cry...

Fugly is the new Pretty

I think we all know, at this point, how i handle extended periods of free-time. At the beginning, i form a plan. I decide what i WILL DO throughout the week to make my vacation worthwhile. I map out the days and what beneficial activity i'll do then. The second day, i throw that away and plan a plethora of social outings and go on a few of them. The third day i don't do anything. NOTHING. ALL DAY. Day 4 brings more outing with friends and me finally realizing i need to get on my list of things to do. I generally don't do it anyway... With Day 5 comes sleeping in VERY VERY late and finally starting the list. At this time, i begin mourning the vacation, because it's just like a regular weekend now. Interspersed throughout these days are times (about 2 hours in length) when i just veg on the internet. I watch half of the Brotherhood 2.0 archives, laugh it up with P0YKPAC and thecommunitychannel. And of course, who could forget icanhascheezburger.com or roflrazzi.com or failblog.org or pointlesssites.com. THEN, there's twitter and picnik and plinky and FACEBOOK! As you can see, the beloved internet plays a big part in my over-the-break activities*. One of these such sites, NEWLY DISCOVERED, is gofugyourself.
I love this site. I want to know the people who put it up. Such wit! Such a smarmy, snarky voice! Such horrible fashions! Such ABSOLUTE INSANE CELEBRITIES! Oooh, it's awesome.
Really, i love cattiness. You know those pillows** that say "If you have nothing good to say, come sit by me"? I fully believe in those pillows. I think one of the conditions of being catty though, is that you have to be smart. Just looking at some ugly quote-unquote "dress" and stating that it's ugly WILL NOT DO. You must, as the girls of GFY do, call it "the dress that looks like a giant sideways bow tie". Because, ISN'T IT TRUE?***
This site, other than for just obvious reasons, is not good for me. It makes me think it's okay to walk around being smarmy and catty and snarky, it makes me more inclined to laugh at crazy people, and i've learned that i can't look at it for too long. Because, after a while, i start thinking its OKAY. Like, of course "Posh Spice" went to dinner or some other probably upscale place looking like she was actually going to a furry convention. Does that surprise you? Or even WORSE, i'll start to want what they're wearing. And thinking, maybe, just MAYBE they actually know what they're doing... This most often happens with the wildest, craziest outfits. When i start looking at Katy Perry's dresses with not question, but wonderment and even *gulp* admiration, THEN i know it is time to un-fug and try to get farther on the list.

But i encourage you, dear reader! Go Fug Yourself!

*And perhaps plays a part in my not-getting-things-done activities...? Hmm, to ponder
**probably more than just pillows are embroidered with that...you can embroider pretty much anything these days.
***Yes.

Its 11:26

So that means i have [umm, lets see, 60-26....screw it, i'll just wait until 11:30] 34 minutes to write something meaningful for today...

So TODAY, i had an odd experience*. No, i'm not talking about sleeping until 1pm**, nor about going to dance class***. I'm speaking of actually going to see a show where i don't REALLY know the people involved. Honestly, this is the first time in quite some time where i've stayed after the curtains for Act II have closed and NOT known the people i was waiting for.

I consider myself pretty artistic and as such, like to support other people who share my enthusiasm. Last week, i saw HSM2 and after the show, 1)saw a lot of people i knew and 2) introduced myself to many, many more. Before that i had my own production. Tomorrow, i'm going to EC, where i will most likely loiter by the stage door to see people i know. And yet, tonight i knew very few participants.

I went with Nick and Pam and Alex {not my brother}. The MEN in this group knew a lot of the actors/crew, so we stayed after with them. And while there, i saw my friend Angela, who's brother was in the show. Nevertheless, i did not directly know him.

Anyway, this was an exceedingly blahhh post, so adieu pour maintenant, mes petites choux!

this is a picture from Pippin. But obviously, not the one we saw.

*While multi-tasking, facebook has kindly just informed me that i won in a "who is more organized?" contest. Someone who doesn't know me, clearly.

**Funny story here, at least NOW i am fully caught up on all that sleep i lost during tech week, right? Also, i realized that i cannot rely on myself for getting up when i know i don't really have to...

***REALLY? You think that's odd? It's not, i do that 4/7 days.

What are you?

So, the other day i took a quiz.

Not one of those highly "interesting" memes*, nor a facebook type "What type zombie are you best suited to kill?"** test, nor a twilight-themed character quiz.

I took a BELIEF-O-MATIC quiz.

And really, how was i to resist? How was i to TURN DOWN the quiz that advertises itself with "Even if YOU don't know what faith you are, Belief-O-MaticTM knows. Answer 20 questions about your concept of God, the afterlife, human nature, and more, and Belief-O-Matic™ will tell you what religion (if any) you practice...or ought to consider practicing."

Woww. That's a lot to handle.

And i'm sure at this point you're doubting the accuracy of this quiz***, but really, the Belief-o-matic was pretty discriminating, asking good, in-depth questions. Precisely the sort one would ask when finding out, you know, EVERYTHING. It questioned my belief in a God, and bythewayHOWmanyGodswasthat? It queryed into my thoughts on the holy ghost**** and the big-ol-HAY-zooos. The B-O-M began poking into my rock-solid-ish beliefs on where the bible was right and notsoright. Where did i think i was headed after the unthinkable happened and i *erp* passed on? Did i respect the traditional roles men and women have held? Have i ever sacrificed a baby while doing a sacrificial dance of the moose?*****

I dutifully filled out AT LEAST forty-two questions on all things spiritual, i was linktually guided to a page holding my fate. I took a deep breath. Here it was. Was i right to leave the Catholic Church a year ago? Did popey-kins miss me? Did i belong in a monastery? SHOULD I BECOME JEWISH? All these questions and so many more fought for the main attention in my mind. Finally, i silenced the questions with a definitive click.

And here it was:
1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Liberal Quakers (97%)
3. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (97%)
4. Orthodox Quaker (75%)
5. Neo-Pagan (71%)
6. Reform Judaism (70%)
7. New Age (67%)
8. Secular Humanism (60%)
9. New Thought (57%)
10. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (57%)
11. Theravada Buddhism (56%)
12. Hinduism (55%)
13. Seventh Day Adventist (55%)
14. Sikhism (55%)
15. Mahayana Buddhism (53%)
16. Scientology (53%)
17. Eastern Orthodox (50%)
18. Roman Catholic (50%)
19. Baha'i Faith (49%)
20. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (44%)
21. Orthodox Judaism (44%)
22. Taoism (41%)
23.Jainism (34%)
24. Islam (33%)
25. Nontheist (32%)
26.Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (32%)
27. Jehovah's Witness (32%)

So here are my thoughts in pretty much the true-to-life order: whoa, that's so weird that UUism came up first, despite the fact that i have been fighting it for like, this whole year! WHOA Jehovah's witness??!?! MORMONS?!?!? Awesome, look how many times i got an eastern religion. Yesss. Cool, taoism. {i love that book, The Tao of Pooh } Scientology? That's odd. Hehee, Tom Cruise******. Oh, that's kind of disappointing that Roman Catholic is on here at all. Oh well, at least it's only 50%. Juddhaisim is relatively cool. Humanism. Awesome. Buddhism? YES! That's so exotic! Okay, now time to look at the top five [i.e. what actually counts]. UU. Liberal Quaker-what's that? Liberal Christian Protestants? Alright, i'll take it. Orthodox Quaker?? Neo-pagan...Wait WHAT??!?! NEO-PAGAN!?!?

At this point, i madly started researching Quakers {better known as "Friends"} and Neo-Paganism. I swear, it is SO not as scary as it sounds. I also went to see what exactly people had to say about UUism. Notsonice things, as it turns out.

So now i feel very conflicted. I really HAVE been fighting UUism tooth and nail for quite some time, in favor of a more Christian church. Linda considered me joining the congregation's Youth Group an Epic Win for her and UUs everywhere. But now i actually look up what they/we believe in and...i agree with all of it? Verrrry Disconcerting.

IN OTHER NEWS: I finally got to watch Across the Universe today. The verdict: i want to live in that world. I don't say this to be macabre, i just really do. The colours are beautiful, the music even more so. It was like a feast for my senses. I would be sitting there on the couch and without even realizing it, start singing along. Ohh, it was magic.

*i lie. I LOVE those quizzes. :D
**Because that IS le question on everyone's mind...
***I know I started doubting whe i saw those tms...
****Ooh, }spooky{
*****Just kidding about that one...
******Nice job, Tom Cruise, making yourself the first thing people think of when they think scientology. Way to curse a religion. }:(

AM/PM

First off, as a side note to my beloved Holly- i reallyreallyreally hope your foot/heel gets better ay-sap. And i REALLY want to wear those squishy-heel things. Like a lot a lot. Also, i think we both know that Google controls the world*.

NOW, I would like to say that i think better at night. Is this a crime? I should say not! Many people think better when the sun is gone** and the moon is rising. Not only do i myself have clearer connects from point to point, i also tend to slip in a HECKUVA lot more shakespearean dialogue. So THAT's weird...
One of the benefits of having Spring Break, like, NOW, is that i may stay up madly late for the very reason that i am free to sleep in as long as i like the next morning. This, of course, ends when i go back to school next week. But, for as long as until Sunday**** i will stay up late to bring you mad ramblings from a crazed rambler*****. You will read and you will enjoy.

Anypants, writing this so late at night is interesting in the fact that this is written SO LATE that it is actually tomorrow ******. So really, this is not written late at night, but shamelessly early in the morning. This raises the question, do i function shakespeareanly at night or early in the morning? TBD.




*FUN FACT: Blogger is owned by Google. Ergo, Google, did in fact make me famous.
**or, erm, lighting the other half of the world...ask lyss, science be not me strongest of thine subjects***
*** woww.
****Possibly saturday. Because, you know, SUNDAY, by all logical conclusions is actually a school night. And THAT, my friends, was an awful lot of commas for one sentence... i THINK it was correct?
*****And OMYGOSH this is sooo off-topic and absolutely insane, but i must mention it. If SIJFWIWS were a sitcom [scary thought, right?] Mad Ramblings from a Crazed Rambler would be the spin-off. A-ha! Perhaps SBL would star...?
******WHA?!?!? My mind just exploded!!! Next your going to go into how it's already friday in Australia!! {its totally not}
*******You may notice i spelled organised with Her Majesty's English? ACTUALLY, its Bill's English. By Bill i mean William Shakespeare....

Google-able!!!

Today, is the first day of April. As such, it is not only the worldwide* holiday known as "chew very spicy gum and then see fake bugs everywhere" day, it is also THE FIRST DAY OF BEDA!

So, i signed up my blog at the front offices {ish}, wrote a couple intense "preparation blogs", stockpiled ideas like there's no tomorrow, wrote some horrible metaphors [need to get them out of the way early], and HERE WE ARE!

I'm hoping that since i DID sign in with the front desk {see above note} and SIJFWIWS** is now, in theory, a more widely-publicized blog***, we'll get some more business around here. Which means, the jokes need to be snappier, the commas need to know where they belong, and, ABOVE ALL, the topics need to be at there most interesting.

This being said, why don't we talk about ME.

You may look up to that title**** and see that it says "Google-able" with a handy smattering of exclamation points*****.

Laddies and their counterparts, it is true. I am, in fact Google-able. You can try it out, if you like. I IMPLORE you to, if it will help the cause. Go on. I'll wait.

I assume at this time you have. We may continue

I did a screen shot , for those of you unable to tear your eyes away from this page.

Do you see? DO you SEE?? There, under the interesting conversation, foreign language, and something about Memphis, is this beloved url!! Not only that, but it also includes some quirky quip i once said. FAME! At long last, we meet! No, this is not just some "All As" thing posted by the schoolboard, not just random happenstance that my first and last name [online, anyway] fall together and end up on Google. IT IS MY NAME!

I feel so very real. As if, by some poor smudge in Oregon suddenly being able to certify my existence *POOF* it is true! Some wackadoo in North Carolina can now say for certain to her husband, "Yes, its true Maddi Mifa-sometimes known as Dore Mifa- is real. I googled her the other day". And then THAT couple will cook pancakes and raise children who know of me. Those will be some mighty fine, worldly children, let me tell you. Someday, they too will find themselves google-able.

And with that, we come full circle. But enough about me. How about you? Let's go through BEDA together, my fine feathered friend.

*i don't know if this is ENTIRELY accurate. Do the Cambodians celebrate April Fool's Day? Perhaps THIS is why the world is broken right now...

**DANGG that is a long abbreviation! I need to fix this...

***My goodness gracious though, PLEASE do not think that is the sole reason in my signing up! GOOD HEAVENS, no! I signed up with integrity!

****You can recognize its title-osity by the slightly larger print, its waaay-up-there-ness, and above all, the ability to click it.

*****NOT an interrobang though, and THAT in itself may cause quite the controversy